people pleaser

As a soon-to-be bride I have been faced with many challenges and the biggest one is in fact the most unexpected. I thought that I'd have a dress problem or a food problem or even an invitation problem, but none of these things can compare to the biggest problem of all. After reading about 20 bridal magazines the one message what was repeated was this:

You cannot please everyone. This is YOUR day. Plan a wedding that will make YOU happy.

Now, I have been quite aware of this for the majority of my life. Having been to hundreds of weddings as a videographer I am well aware that this is the couples' day. I've also seen first hand that no matter what decisions are made, someone will not be happy about it. These facts are not just for weddings, but in everyday life as well. However, for some reason weddings make people go CRAZY! I cannot put into words how stressful the past few weeks have been. Everyday I receive a devotional from Rick Warren, and I received this one yesterday. God's timing completely amazes me. He knew exactly what I needed to hear and I am so very grateful for my Father's love.

 September 23, 2009
Quit Trying to Please Everybody
by Rick Warren

"It is dangerous to be concerned with what others think of you" (Proverbs 29:25 GN).

When we worry about what other people think, we let them control us. We waste a lot of time and energy trying to figure out what other people want us to be. Then, we waste a lot of time and energy trying to become like that rather than just being what God made us to be. You're manipulated and controlled by somebody else.

Worrying about what other people think is dangerous because we're more likely to cave in to criticism. It means we don't always do the right thing; instead, we do the thing that everybody wants us to do.

And we're in danger of missing God's best because we're so worried about what other people what us to do that we can't stop to think about what God wants us to do.

• Fact #1: You cannot please everybody. Even God can't please everybody. One person prays for it to rain; another prays for it to be sunny. In the Super Bowl, both teams are praying that they will win. Who is God going to answer? God can't please everybody. Only a fool would try to do what even God can't do. You can't please everybody.

• Fact #2: It's not necessary to please everybody. There is a myth that says you must be loved and approved by everybody in order to be happy. That's just not true. You don't have to please everybody in order to be happy in life.

• Fact #3: Rejection will not ruin your life. It hurts, sure. It's not fun. It's uncomfortable. But rejection will not ruin your life unless you let it.

Quit trying to please everybody! Remember that nobody can make you feel inferior unless you give them permission.

The Apostle Paul says, "If God is for us, who can be against us?" (Romans 8:31 TEV) This means we can think like this: 'God likes me, and I like me; if you don't like me, then you've got a problem. If God likes me, who cares that everybody doesn't approve of everything I do.'

Remember, nothing you ever do will make God love you less. Nothing you ever do will make God love you more. He loves you completely right now.